Driven to Distraction

Apparently one of my grandchildren has forgotten the basic tenet of Grandparent/Grandchildren relationships: What happens at Grandma's stays at Grandma's.

Miranda (to her mom):  Grandma said a bad word while she was driving.
Robyn: Oh, what did she say?
Miranda:  Can I say the word?
Robyn: Okay.
Miranda: Jerk!
Robyn: I see. What else did she say?
Miranda:  She said "You jerk!  You can't be texting and driving!  You're going to kill your kid and everybody else!

Okay, maybe I do talk a little to the other drivers while I'm in the car. How else are you going to let them know that they are complete idiots and---I'm trying to merge into this lane here the least you could do is move over!!! People sometimes talk to me but I usually can't make out what they are saying.

Well, there was that one time when I was learning how to drive a stick shift and stalled the car through nine changes of the left-hand turn signal. I could hear some of them then. My girlfriend, Glenda, was in the car with me but she may not have heard. I didn't know someone could even fit all the way down onto the floorboard of a Volkswagen Bug and  completely out of sight of the windows.

 I don't make hand gestures, though. Well, I do kind of wave "Thank you" when somebody lets me in. Or "Sorry, sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to cut you off like that."

It's not like when our former pastor was passing someone whose car had a bumper sticker for our church and the guy thought Bro. Rod wasn't driving well or something and put his hand out the window to gesture but it wasn't a wave. And then they both wound up at the gas station at the next exit and Bro. Rod got out of the car to say "Hi." Surprise!

Somebody needs to develop a better way to communicate between cars on the road. Like big signs you could hold up. SORRY and THANK YOU and HANG UP THE PHONE! and like that. If they were filed alphabetically and kept in the pocket of the driver's door it wouldn't be too hard to reach down and get one.

Your kids or grandkids could hand them to you when you need one. And then maybe they wouldn't find it necessary to tell every little thing that happens in the car.