Tuesday, November 22, 2011

The Top Ten Things I Am Thankful For

10.  THE CLEANERS:  Where else could I get 5,322 wire coat hangers and have them twist together into a mass the size of an oil rig and cling to the rod in my closet?

9.     SAM'S CLUB:  Where else could I purchase a bag of shredded cheese of a quantity to feed the whole Occupy Wall Street group and have it take up one fourth of my refrigerator?

8.     ATTORNEYS:  Without attorneys, how would I know not to use my electric hair dryer in the bathtub or not to eat the tempting little packages of silicone that come in shipping boxes?

7.     CUSTOMER SERVICE REPS FROM THIRD WORLD COUNTRIES:  They keep me humble remembering that they speak more English than I do Farsi and trying to devise new ways to communicate to them what I am asking that might be answered within the parameters of their written scripts.

6.     THIS LOVELY NEW BLOG SERVER:  When else would I have been able to recall a whole vocabulary that I thought I had erased from my mind after Junior High school?

5.     E-MAIL:  In what other medium would I be offered fantastic products that will enhance many amazing parts of my anatomy or learn about the dozens of,  uh,...physically needy young men in my very own community who are anxious to meet little old ladies such as myself?

4.      AUTOMATED RECORDED PHONE CALLS:  They give me hope that I am not as stupid as they may think because not once have I stayed on the line and waited for someone to come on and pitch a product I don't need or solicit for a charity that is wasting it's money on administrative services like them.

3.     TELEMARKETERS WHO CALL ME ON MY CELL PHONE:  Because of them I have an automatic check to make sure my phone is working and ready to receive calls and give employment to those nice folks at A T &T who make up my bills.

2.     MY MEMORY:  I'm so glad to be able to think back to when I was a kid and the fun things we did and ....What was the question?

AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON I AM THANKFUL THIS THANKSGIVING SEASON******

1.     THIS BLOG:  Because no matter how often I do something else that makes me look and/or feel like an idiot, at least I can say to myself  "Well, it will give me something else to blog about."


Please enjoy this time to remember what you and I are really thankful for:  Our Lord, our families, our free country and the privilege of communicating with friends like you.

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