Things Under the Bed

I'm not sure what all is under my bed any more. Probably a little, okay, a bunch of dust, of course. There was an old, black and white Jimmy Stewart movie called "Harvey" in which Harvey was a six-foot tall rabbit. I'm kind of thinking what some people call dust bunnies under the bed has most likely grown into Harvey by now. I can't get down there to look.  Well, okay, I could get down there but then I couldn't get up and my days of sleeping on the floor are long past.

When our cats were kittens we were always losing them under the bed.  They had found a hole in the dust protector (you know: that cheesecloth looking thing that is stapled to the bottom of the box springs)   It was just big enough for them to squeeze in and whenever you tried to grab one he ran to the other side, his little feet bouncing like he was on a trampoline.  There was no way that you could get them out even if you poked them with a broom which they thought was a hilarious game.  They waited until we finally gave up, took a little cat-nap till we were sound asleep, then came out and dashed around the bedroom causing us (and by "us" I mean me) to get up and chase them.  Then they ran under the bed and up into the dust cover again.  It was quite fun. For them.

Eighteenth Century reproduction furniture was the most popular style back when I sold furniture and we sold a lot of four-poster beds, some called Rice Beds (sheaves of rice carved into the posts) and others called Tester Beds  (usually straight pencil-shaped posts.)  What those beds had in common was that they were way-way-way! off the floor, usually about sixteen to eighteen inches, and you could see straight through from one side of the room to the other if you bent down and looked. The point being that heat rises and in 1786 or so, with no central heat, it was nice to get a little closer to the ceiling.  Also, you could fit the chamber pot under there but we won't go into that today.  We even sold little sets of steps so you could climb into the high beds. I always thought they were beautiful, but even if I could have afforded one, I wouldn't have gotten it because I need to be able to hide things under the bed. (But not a chamber pot. Or kittens.)

Whenever I get something too big to fit anywhere else, I slide it under the bed. I know there's a big frying pan under there now.  My daughter-in-law was getting rid of hers and it was better than mine so I took it but I don't want to give up my old one yet. I may get the urge to fry up a lot of something. The leaf to the table is under there. (Here's a tip: if you are storing your table leaves standing up in the closet or somewhere, go get them and put them under the bed. They need to lie flat or they will warp. I know this from my furniture selling days) And a great big stainless steel bowl like they have in commercial kitchens. It is twenty-four inches across and won't fit in my kitchen cabinets.  You could wash a baby in it.  Or have a whole lot of salad to go with all that stuff you fried. I've only used it once, but you never know. They make nice containers on wheels to store things under your bed, like shoes, I guess, but I don't have any of those.

There is most likely a whole lot more. There are probably dog toys that the dog has lost, and cat toys that the dog is hiding from the cat.  And I hope there are two or three earrings and a watch that have disappeared because I've searched everywhere else.  But I might not find out till we move or something. When we got as new mattress a few years ago it was pretty scary under there.  You may be surprised, but I am not the type who moves the bed to vacuum underneath. Please! (I know there are some of  you are out there who do and I beg you: seek help!)

I read in Genesis where God says to Man something like "Dust you were and to dust you shall return."  I'm thinking there may be a man under the bed, but I don't know if he's coming or going.  He's next to Harvey.